Tweaked Perspective
uuuup until a few months ago, I had always drifted
through life constantly sacrificing the present
moment in preparation for the next. I kept myself
in a perpetual haze, a cushion that enabled me to
avoid conflict or unpleasantness at whatever cost.
I did all I could to make sure that the much
anticipated next moment was at least tolerable.
How illogical of me to think that some hypothetical
conflict could be any worse than my fear of it.
This incredible waste of energy was barely successful
at keeping me just above negative. I wasn't sad.
I wasn't happy.
I was complacent.
I always thought I would be happy one day. But not
Today. Never Now. I kept my focus on some future
unforeseeable point, all the while clouding my
awareness of the present.
Then a sudden, slight tweak in my perspective
caused me to realize that happiness wasn't in some
unattainable detached reality. It was within ME. I
was finally able to understand that it's about being
comfortable with the moment. Trusting spontaneity.
Taking control of my experience.
It was about BEING. It was about NOW. It was about HERE.
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Map of Here [Semi] Daily Gestalt Meaningful Mindlessness
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